Shelby and Poof
by Jet Engine
Summary: (Takes place twenty years after the series.) A one-shot series about the misadventures of Poof and his first godchild: Shelby Maxwell, a ten year-old girl in Dimmsdale. Episode Three: Shelby doesn't want to go to a school dance alone, so Poof poses as her date. Meanwhile, Mr. Crocker is convinced that Shelby is a fairy.
1. Theme Song

**I think I'm the first author to write about Poof's future godchild. I've seen a couple fanfics about future Poof, but never one with him as fairy godparent. Well, it's time to change that!**

**This is just the theme song. I think you'll find it to be quite familiar. ;)**

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><p><em>Shelby is an average girl<em>

_That no one understands._

_Mom and all the bullies,_

_Always giving her commands._

Girl Bully: "Go away!"

_All the problems of her days_

_Are gone again instantly_

_By a little hamster, who grants wishes for her_

_'Cause in reality,_

_He is her odd parent._

_Fairly odd parent._

Poof: "Wands and wings, floaty crown-y things!"

_Odd parent,_

_Fairly odd parent._

_Real odd, pea pod, buff bod, hot rod,_

Shelby: "Obtuse, tiny goose, purple moose, guava juice,

Giant snake, chocolate cake, small fries, large shake!"

_Odd parent,_

_Fairly odd parent._

_It's time to read about the ten year-old_

_With a fairly odd parent!_

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><p><strong>Are you curious? I hope so, cause I really want to write some one-shots! Review!<strong>


	2. Fairly Odd Pilot

**Summary: Poof is assigned to Shelby, who isn't quite sure what to make of him.**

**So, this is basically just introductions. The other one-shots will have actual plots. I think. Also, my version of Poof is a little nerdy, but he's still lovable.**

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><p><strong>Fairly Odd Pilot<strong>

Our story begins in Fairy World. More specifically, just outside of the office of Jorgen von Strangle, where two familiar fairies waited anxiously for their son, whom they had escorted there for moral support. Well, one was anxious. The other was thinking about cheese.

"Boy, I sure hope Poof is okay," Wanda said as she clung to her wand with both hands. "He's never had a godchild before. M-maybe it's too soon."

Cosmo waved off her worries. "Relax, Wanda. Poof's like me: nothing to worry about. Oh! Oh!" His attention was quickly diverted to something on the ground. "A nickel! He can be a friend for Philip!" He was referring to his 'pet' nickel.

Meanwhile, twenty-two year-old Poof Cosma sat in Jorgen's office. Poof had lavender-colored hair that was styled the way as his father's but at half the length. His eyesight had gotten poor over the years, so he wore glasses over his purple eyes. He wore a lavender shirt under a white lab coat (he was a Fairy World-renouned scientist and was quite proud of it) and black pants and shoes. Like most fairies, he also had a crown floating above his head.

Jorgen was standing in front of the much smalled fairy, with his back turned to him. "Poof, as you know, this will be your first time with a godchild." He turned to face Poof. "Given how smart you are - which is weird, considering how smart your father _isn't_ - I trust that you can handle it."

Poof saluted, simply because he felt like he was supposed to. "Yes, sir."

"And," Jorgen continued with a pointed look, "I trust that we won't have another _incident_?"

Poof groaned. "You suck Fairy World into another dimension _one time_..."

"_Just don't let it happen again_!"

"Yes, sir! I mean, no, sir! I mean, uh-"

A paper appeared in front of him, and he grabbed it and looked it over. At the top corner was a picture of an African-American girl. She had brown eyes and dark brown hair that was braided in cornrows that had red beads on the ends. She wore a red hoodie, a blue jean skirt, and black Mary Jane shoes.

"This is your first assignment. Her name is Shelby Maxwell. She is a ten year-old girl, who has just moved to Dimmsdale, California." Poof smiled, remembering growing up there. He briefly wondered how Timmy and Sparky were doing. Jorgen frowned in realization. "Wait. I just realized that you grew up in Dimmsdale." He glared. "Don't do anything stupid."

Poof rolled his eyes. "Jorgen, do you know who you're talking to?"

"Yes. I am talking to the spawn of the dumbest guy in Fairy World."

"Point taken. But, ironically, I am also the _smartest_ guy in Fairy World."

"Just go read over your godchild's profile. And, don't be cocky about it."

Poof saluted again before floating out of the office. He closed the door behind him, and his mother floated worriedly to his side. "Are you okay, sweetie?" she asked. "I know getting your first godchild can be scary, and Jorgen doesn't really help."

"Relax, Mom. I got this," Poof assured. "I've studied hard, I've helped you and Dad with Timmy - sort of - and I'm confident in my magic." He raised his wand for emphasis.

"Well...alright... But, know that you can always come to your father and me for advice."

Cosmo got his pants caught in a pencil sharpener, which pulled them off, revealing his adult diaper.

Wanda noticed this and corrected herself. "Okay, you can always come to _me_ for advice."

She and Poof hugged, and Poof said, "I know, Mom. But, I'll be fine." They released each other. "You know something? I'm actually gonna be working in Dimmsdale, too. I won't be too far from you, so there's no need for empty nest-" His mother gripped him tightly in her arms. "-syndrome." Cosmo ran, screaming, from the pencil sharpener that was 'chasing' him for some reason. "Should we help Dad?"

Wanda just held him tighter, to the point that his face almost matched his hair color. "Stay close to Mommy!"

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><p>Meanwhile, in Dimmsdale, Shelby walked into her house, wearing a purple back pack. Her mother was quickly there to greet her. "Welcome back, honey. How was your first day of school?"<p>

Shelby faked a smile so that her mother wouldn't worry. "Well, it was a first day at a new school in a new city, far away from Bakersfield. When do we move back? Ignore that last part."

Mom sighed in sympathy. "Shelby, I know moving isn't easy, but my promotion-"

"-means we have to move and that you'll make a lot more money," Shelby finished. "I get that, and I'm sure I'll get use to this place. I just have to make some friends and survive my crazy teacher."

Mom smiled. "That's the spirit! Uh, crazy teacher?"

Shelby recalled what happened the moment she walked into homeroom...

_"Ah, you must be the new student, Shelby Maxwell," her teacher greeted._

_Shelby smiled politely. "That's me."_

_"Splendid! I'm Mr. Crocker. Now, before you do anything else, I need you to answer one question."_

_Shelby heard one of the students groan, "Here he goes..."_

_Crocker ignored him. "Tell me, Miss Maxwell, do you believe in...FAIRY GODPARENTS!?"_

"Don't ask," Shelby responded. She started walking to her room on the second floor. "I'm gonna go do my homework and finish unpacking."

"Alright," Mom replied.

Shelby opened the door to her room, glanced at the boxes on the floor, and sighed longingly. It had only been two days, and she was already homesick. She closed the door and sat her back pack on the floor. She walked to her bed and sat on the pink comforter. Wondering if any of her friends had emailed her, she grabbed her laptop from her nightstand and opened it up on her lap. There were two emails: one from her best friend, Amber, and one without an address (the envelope picture next to this one was purple for some reason). She read Amber's email first:

_Hey, Shelby! I hope Dimmsdale's treating you alright. Have I told you that I have family out there? I don't think so. Well, if you're looking for new friends (even though you've probably already made some), look no further than my cousins, Tammy and Tommy! Or, if you wanna befriend some grown-ups (although, you've probably already become BFFs with your new teachers), talk to my Uncle Timmy and Aunt Molly! Whoa... Timmy, Tammy, and Tommy... That's weird, don't you think? My aunt's name should be Mommy or Mimmy or something like that._

_Oh, darn it! Even in an email, all I do is ramble! Anyway, email me back soon! I miss you!_

_PS. Uncle Timmy told me about this psycopath named Mr. Cocker, so...yeah... Avoid him whenever possible._

Shelby laughed bitterly. If only she _could_ avoid him. To top it off, now she was even more homesick. She missed Amber and her endless string of sentences. But, she would be on the lookout for Amber's relatives.

Now for the other email. Shelby paused before opening it. Who would send an email without an address? Was that even possible? After a moment of hesitation, curiousity got the better of her, and she clicked on the email.

"_You've got magic_," the laptop announced.

Shelby would've have had the time to think that was odd, if her laptop hadn't started shaking and glowling a light purple that was almost too glittery to look at. To her surprise and horror, a purple beamed swirled out of the screen and above the device. From it, appeared a purple-haired...man? Pixie? Shelby didn't know what he was.

"Greetings, fair maden," Poof greeted with a dramatic bow. "I'm Poof, and I'm," he made the words, 'Fairy Godparent' appear above her head, "your fairy godparent!"

Shelby blinked, opened her mouth to speak, then blinked again. Her first thought was that this man was insane. Then, she recalled Cocker's clear obbession with fairies. Was that a coincidence? Then, she realized that the creature was floating and had wings...and a crown...and a wand.

When she finally managed to speak, she repeated, "Fairy godparent? You mean like the one in Cinderella?"

"Uh, something like that," Poof replied. "But, I'm not giving you glass slippers and a pumpkin carriage. Unless you want me to."

"So...Poof, was it? Um, not to be rude or anything, but..." Shelby closed her laptop, part of her thinking that someone else might appear out of it, "why are you here?"

Poof wouldn't let himself be disheartened by her reaction. In fact, he was relieved she had reacted as well as she did. "Ah, what a great question! You see, Shelby-"

"You know my name?" Shelby asked in shock.

"Well, I _was_ assigned to you. It's only natural that I'd know a few basic facts about you. Now, as I was saying, fairy godparents are assigned to kids who need a little help in life. Problems like bullies, neglectful parents-"

"Moving?"

"Sure, moving can contribute. As a godparent, it is my civic duty to grant your every wish. No, wait, that's not entirely true. There are certain restrictions."

"Shelby?" Mom called.

Poof raised his wand in a panic. "Someone's coming! Pretend I don't exist!" He poofed away in a cloud that read, 'Hasty Retreat!'

Mom opened the door. "I heard some sort of commotion. Is everything alright?"

Shelby swallowed anxiously. "Uh, yeah. Everything's normal."

Mom's attention was averted to a cage that was suddenly on the floor. "Where did you get a hamster?"

Hamster? What was she talking about? Then, Shelby noticed the hamster cage that wasn't there before. Inside, there was a lavender-colored hamster wearing glasses and looking as nervous as he felt. Poof moved his paw in a 'roll with it' gesture.

Shelby cleared her throat, thinking quickly. "I-I've always had a...purple hamster, Mom." It was clear that Mom wasn't buying it. Perhaps a wish? Poof mentioned restrictions, but that didn't mean this wouldn't work. "I..._wish_ you'd remember him."

Poof raised his wand and granted the wish.

Tiny sparkles appeared around Mom's head, and she blinked in realization. "Oh, right. How could I have forgotten? I'm surprised a hamster survived the move. Well, why don't I make dinner? Of course, all we have right now are TV dinners."

"That's okay, Mom," Shelby commented. Mom nodded and closed the door.

Poof returned to his fairy form and floated next to his godchild. Shelby looked from him to the cage then back to him. "Did you turn into a hamster?"

"Yep. Fairies can shape-shift - for lack of a better term - to hide their identities."

"Why would you wanna do that?"

"Simple; if anyone who does _not_ already know about fairies finds out that you have me around, then I'll be sent away. Forever. It's an old law from a simpler time..."

Shelby blinked twice. "This is gonna take some getting use to."

**The End**

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><p><strong>For some reason, I just picture Poof as a genius. I'm not really sure why. Of course, when you think about it, the series does hint at him being smart. For instance, in "Spellementary School," Poof disarmed nuclear warheads. 'Nuff said. Review!<strong>


	3. Smart Off

**Summary: Shelby wishes that Poof wasn't intelligent, which in turn makes Foop a genius. (Based on "I'm Ready, Break Down the Barriers" by OurLadyGrem)**

**I'd like to thank OurLadyGrem for letting me borrow this plot from her story. :)**

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><p><strong>Smart Off<strong>

Shelby's alarm rang, jolting her awake. She turned it off and stretched with a yawn. "G'morning, Poof." She sat up and did a double take. Her room was filled with barbed wire, land mines, and military-style sandbags. A frantic Poof, dressed in camo and holding a bazooka, appeared next to her. "Poof, why is my room an armed fortress?"

"_Because_," Poof said, as though the answer was obvious, "it's Friday the Thirteenth!" He raised his wand and poofed his godchild into a helmet with a horseshoe on it and protective padding that was made of four leaf clovers. "That should keep you safe."

"Sheesh, Poof. I didn't peg you as the superstitious type."

"I'm not superstitious." He poofed himself into the same protective equipment. "What I _am_ is someone who doesn't want to deal with black magic."

Shelby tilted her head, not knowing what her fairy godparent was talking about. "Black magic? That makes no sense. Then again, just last week I found out that fairies exist, so everything's a little weird, these days."

"Allow me to explain. You see, Shelby, this alleged 'bad luck' is actually a manifestation of black magic, caused by creatures known simply as anti-fairies."

"Anti-fairies?" Shelby groaned and face-palmed. "First fairies, then anti-fairies? Are there any other magical creatures I should know about?"

"I promise, I'll tell you all about the pixies later. Anyway, anti-fairies are the evil opposites of fairies. They love nothing more than to make everyone's life miserable, namely by causing bad luck. In fact, Friday the Thirteenth is practically their Christmas."

Pulling off her armor and revealing the yellow pajamas underneath, Shelby said, "Well, that explains why your freaking out. Don't worry, Poof. I'll be careful."

Poof poofed a rabbit's foot around her neck. "At least wear this good luck charm. It'll establish a barricade that is impermeable to the nefarious creatures."

Shelby face-palmed. "How many times do I have to say it? I don't speak genius."

"Sorry. I'm used to vocalizing my voluminous vocabulary- Oh, darn it! I did it again!" He poofed a calender into his hand. "I blame the word-a-day calender my Grandma Cosma got me for my birthday last year." He threw the calender aside. "You know, it's moments like these that make me wish I wasn't so smart." An idea popped into his head. "That's it! Shelby, wish me into an idiot."

"Say what now?" Shelby asked, stepping off her bed and being careful not to trip a land mine. "How about I start by wishing _away_ all the military-style protection?" Poof raised his wand, and the military equipment disappeared in a cloud of purple smoke. "Why the heck would you wanna be dumb?"

Poof crossed his arms. "For one thing, I'm sick of people not comprehending what I'm saying. Also, I've always been curious about what goes on in a dumb person's head."

Shelby laughed. "And, if your too stupid to know what's going on, maybe you'll stop being so paranoid." Poof laughed sheepishly. "Okay, then. I wish you were stupid!"

With a twirl of his wand, Poof granted the wish, and a cloud that read, 'Moron' enveloped him. Suddenly, a massive migraine overtook him, and he held his head in agony as millions of different facts and statistics left his brain.

_Maybe this wasn't such a good idea_, Shelby lamented as she watched her godparent writhe in agony. "Poof? A-are you okay?"

Poof descended slightly. "My head has the ouchies... Did I say ouchies? I think the wish worked."

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><p>Meanwhile, in Anti-Fairy World, Foop was preparing to cause bad luck. He was dressed a blue shirt that was slightly darker than his skin, a black leather jacket, and navy blue pants. Unlike his counterpart, his hair was blue, and he had perfect vision. He had various torture devices strewn out on his bed. "Let's see, spiders, banana peels, anvils, jackhammers. Everything I need to cause bad luck." Suddenly, a cloud that read 'Opposite of Poof' enveloped him. Like his counterpart, he started writhing in the agony of a sudden migraine. In his case, a wide variety of information crammed its way into his brain. "Ugh... I feel as though my cranial capacity has reached its peaking point. Wait, what? Did I just understand that? Yes, I believe I did."<p>

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><p>Later...<p>

Shelby walked into her room and sat her backpack on the floor. "Poof, I'm home from school," she called, but her godparent was nowhere to be seen. "Poof? Are you here, Poof?"

The fairy in question appeared beside her. "I'm having the time of my life! Now that I'm stupid, I don't overthink things, and I feel like I can do anything! Mostly because I'm immortal, and I heal very quickly. Now, if you'll excuse me," a parachute appeared on his back, "I'm gonna jump out that window! Wheeeeeeeeeee!" He jumped out the second-story window, but he landed before his parachute opened. Fortunately, he was too idiotic to care. "The ground is hard!"

Shelby shook her head. She was glad that Poof was having fun, but she still had a bad feeling about the situation. "Are you okay?" she called.

Poof reappeared beside her. He was a little dizzy and covered in bruises. "That parachute was faulty." He magicked himself back to top condition. "All better!"

"Uh, Poof, maybe I should wish you back to normal." Shelby decided to voice her concerns. "I just feel like this is gonna bite us in the butt."

Poof waved off her concerns. "Ah, come on, kid. What could possibly go wrong?" He heard a poof - well, anit-poof - from behind and turned around. He smacked his forehead, realizing that, even in his current mental state, he should have known better than to say, 'What could possibly go wrong?' "Oh, great. Him."

Foop grinned mischieviously. "Salutations, my old adversary. You may not have executed an unfortuate error, but that is not the conclusion as to why I have materialized in your habitation."

Poof blinked, no longer able to comprehend any that. Shelby echoed his thoughts, "Wow, those words are huge."

It was then that Foop noticed her presence. His smirk turned to an intrigued smile. "And, who might you be?"

Poof floated in between them, more than prepared to defend his godchild. "This is Shelby, and don't you dare touch her."

Foop rolled his eyes. "I couldn't touch her if I tried. She's wearing a good luck charm."

Shelby held her rabbit's foot in one hand, now remembering that Poof had given it to her. "Good luck charms actually work?"

"They create an impenetrable barrier that anti-faries, like myself, cannot surpass," Foop explained, knocking on an invisible barrier around the girl.

A little frightened by the mention of him being an anti-fairy, Shelby took a sheepish step back. "S-so, you're one of those anti-fairies, then?"

Foop proudly puffed out his chest. "That I am, toots. My name is Foop. I am the evil counterpart of Dr. Doofenshmirtz** (**_**Phineas and Ferb**_** reference)**, over here," he said, jerking his thumb at his at Poof.

"Oh, yeah?" Poof remarked, offended. "Well, your...face is dumb!"

Foop blinked in surprise. "That's seriously the best you could come up with? Given your mental capacity, I would have anticipated a much more prominent aspersion."

Poof went cross-eyed in confusion. "Is that Spanish for something?"

Feeling a strange combination of annoyance and curiosity, Foop asked, "So, the day I suddenly turn intelligent, you decide to turn into your father? And, here I came all this way to shove my newfound IQ in your face and possibly beat you at chess, for once."

Despite barely managing to follow the conversation, Shelby managed to piece some things together. "Wait, Foop, you said you were Poof's opposite, right?"

"Right...?" Foop replied, wondering where she was going with this.

"I wished Poof would be stupid, which he is, so would the opposite happen to you and make you a genius?"

Foop pretended not to be bothered by a child figuring it out before him. "By Jove, I think she's got it."

"Who's Jove?" Poof asked. "Is _that_ Spanish for something?"

"Do you realize what this means?"

"No. That's why I'm asking you."

Foop ignored him and grinned. "It means I'm smarter than you, and I use my newfound brainpower to make this the best Friday the Thirteenth ever! But, first..." He anit-poofed Poof into a butterfly net.

"A butterfly net?" Shelby asked, genuinely confused.

Foop shrugged. "Fairy magic doesn't work on them."

"So, if I trapped _you_ in a butterfly net..."

"Oh, please. I'm the _opposite_ of a fairy. My weakness is the opposite of a butterfly net. Any who, I'd love to stay and chat, but I've got some misfortune to cause!"

He vanished in a dark puff of smoke, and Poof asked his godchild, "Who's Miss Fortune?"

"Focus, Poof!" Shelby threw the butterfly net off him. "What's the opposite of a butterfly net?"

Poof blinked. "I-I don't know. I think I used to-"

"Then, I wish you were smart again!"

Heck. Why did she have to wish for that? "Uh, I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"I...lost my wand! That's it!"

Shelby deadpanned. "You're lying."

Poof crossed his arms defiantly. "You don't know that."

"Fine. Then, look me in the eye, and tell me you lost your wand."

"I lost my wand."

"That's my chin."

"I lost my wand."

"That's my forehead! I wish you'd tell the truth!"

"Darn it, Shelby!" Poof sighed. He should have known he couldn't keep the secret forever. "Okay, okay." He bashfully kneeded the wand that he did _not_ actually lose. "The thing is... How do I put this? When I was smart, I made a lot of inventions that...caused some problems. Like, Fairy World getting sucked into another dimension and cappuccino-flavored potato chips **(reference to the Lay's "Do Us a Flavor" contest of 2014)**. I-I guess I just thought that everyone's lives would be easier if I stopped being so smart."

Shelby's stern expression into one of sympathy. "Ah, I see where you're coming from, Poof, but your brains help people, too. Like you helped me with my homework yesterday. And, you normally know how to stop the anti-fairies."

Poof nodded in understanding, but still wasn't entirely convinced. "Yeah, I guess... But, still, you have to admit that I haven't confused you at all, today."

"Actually, you jumping out the window was kind of baffling." She paused. "Though, judging by your expression, I'd say you have no idea what baffling means." Poof shook his head. "Nevermind. I just wish you were smart again." Poof glanced hesitantly at his wand. "Come on, Poof. You can't possibly favor a moron over being smart. Besides, that-Foop-guy isn't usually a genius, right?"

That was all the convincing Poof needed. "Good point, Shelby. I guess having a smarty-pants good guy is better than a smarty-pants bad guy. I guess I could always just be more careful with my inventions." On that note, he granted Shelby's wish. Out of nowhere, he announced, "The sum of the squares of the legs of a right triangle is equal to the square of the hypotenuse!"

Shelby just stared at him for a moment. "I think it worked, cause I have no idea what you just said."

"Oh, that was just the Pythagorean Theorem." Poof proudly puffed out his chest. "I must say, it feels good to be back. It was weird having a one-track mind, anyway."

"So, out of curiosity, is Foop normally a moron? And, what is the opposite of a butterfly net?"

"Foop's not really stupid. I'm a bit of a nerd, in case you haven't noticed, and Foop's the opposite of that: a jock."

"Really?"

"Yep. In high school, I was captain of the robotics team; he was captain of the football team. That sort of thing. Now, to answer your other question, cardboard boxes are the opposite of butterfly nets."

"Right..." Shelby thought that was even dumber and more specific than butterfly nets.

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><p>Meanwhile, in Anti-Fairy World, Foop was floating in front of a large laser he had created. He remembered designing it to spread bad luck all over the earth, but for some reason he couldn't figure out how it worked.<p>

He was still smarter than Poof...right?

* * *

><p>Back in Dimmsdale, Shelby thought about what Poof said about the anti-fairies weakness. "I wish Foop was in a cardboard box."<p>

As for the anti-fairy in question, he decided to chance it and press every single button at the same time. Unfortunately for him, this overloaded the device. And, he was suddenly trapped in a box. "Where'd the cardboard box come from?" The machine exploded, sending him flying.

**The End**

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><p><strong>Well, that didn't turn out too badly. :) Review and bacon! Wow, that was random.<strong>


	4. Dancing With the Wands

**Summary: Shelby doesn't want to go to a school dance alone, so Poof poses as her date. Meanwhile, Mr. Crocker is convinced that Shelby is a fairy.**

**This turned out longer than expected. Not that that's a bad thing.**

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><p><strong>Dancing With the Wands<strong>

Three students had stayed after school to help decorate the gynmasium for the school's romance dance. One was Shelby, and the other two were Tammy and Tommy, Timmy Turner's fraternal twins from the end of 'Channel Chasers.' A few days ago, Poof had introduced Shelby to his parents and their godchilden, so the three fairies were assisting their charges. Sure, the fairies could have easily poofed the decorations in place, but Shelby suggested that they do it manually, saying that they wouldn't have their fairies' magic forever and that they should do some things on their own. Her friends couldn't help but agree.

Right now, the six of them had a large white banner on the ground and were painting the words 'Romance Dance!' on it in red. Tommy glanced over at Shelby, who took notice and asked, "What?"

Tommy scratched the back of his neck and blushed. He had developed a bit of a crush on her. "Uh, n-nothing. So, uh... You guys excited for the school's romance dance?"

"I know I am," Tammy said, deciding to ignore her brother's obvious attempt to change the subject.

"Oooh." Poof playfully wiggled his eyebrows. "Does someone have a hot date?"

Tammy grinned. "Maybe..."

Cosmo sighed happily. "You know what this reminds me of?"

Wanda smiled, knowing exactly what he was talking about. "Our prom night?"

"Yeah. Sparks really flew that magical night."

Wanda blushed. "Oh, Cosmo!"

"Of course, that wouldn't have happened, if I hadn't spilled my punch on the sound system." Wanda deadpanned.

The kids and Poof couldn't help giggling. Shelby looked over the now-finished banner and said thoughtfully, "I think...it needs more glitter."

Cosmo raised his wand. "My thoughts exactly!" A bucket appeared over the banner and poured pink sparkles all over it, making a shimmering cloud momentarily fill the gym. Everyone coughed until the cloud disappeared.

Meanwhile, Mr. Cocker had just started peaking through the window outside and was spying the six of them. Fortunately, he had not seen the the pink cloud of glitter. "Hm, nothing unusual in there." Wanda raised her wand and levitated the banner in place on the ceiling. "Plenty of children have pastel-colored hair and can levitate things with a working wand- Wait a minute!" Suddenly, he realized what he was seeing. "No mere mortal can make a banner that glittery! One of those kids must be a FAIRY! The question remaining: which one is it?"

Inside, Shelby looked up at the banner and noted, "Whoops. Forgot to dot the exclamation point."

Crocker saw the purple-haired one raise a wand. "That kid's got a light-up toy wand. Nothing magic about that." Then, he saw Shelby float up to the banner and paint on a dot, and he gasped. "Human-children don't float! Only human-_babies_ to that! **(Bad Heir Day)** That little black student of mine, uh, whats-her-name! _She_ must be the fairy in the group!"

Poof gently put his godchild back on the ground and commented, "I assume you're going to the Romance Dance, kid?"

Shelby frowned and shook her head. "Oh, no no no. I'm not going to be the only loser without a date." Tommy grinned and opened his mouth to ask her to be his date. "Besides, I'm not really interested in anyone, anyway."

Tommy frowned dejectedly, and his sister offered him a sympathetic smile. He cleared his throat. "Y-you know, Shelby-" He faltered when Shelby's cocoa brown eyes met his blue ones. He swallowed and pulled on his shirt collar, suddenly warm. "We-we could g-go to the dance together? I-if you want..."

Wanda rolled her eyes good-naturedly, Tammy and Poof stifled laughs, and Cosmo was just confused. Shelby... Well, she didn't take the hint. "You mean go and hang out with you guys?" Tommy gaped at her obliviousness. "I don't know. It is a _romance_ da-" Tammy and Poof fell to the floor in fits of laughter. Wanda glared daggers at them, and Shelby and Cosmo were more confused than ever. "What? What did I say?"

* * *

><p>Later...<p>

Shelby was lying on her belly on her bed, chewing her pencil eraser as she did her math homework. Poof appeared next to her and sat cross-legged on her bed. "You know, kid," he said, "you're allowed to go to that dance alone."

As much as she wanted to do just that, she tried to seem passive on the subject. "What makes you think I even want to go at all?"

Poof shrugged. "Call it a hunch. Also, you've been talking about the dance all week, which is kind of a give-away."

Shelby sighed, put her pencil down, and sat up. "Well, Poof, it's like I said: I don't want to be the only one without a date."

Poof almost laughed again, as he recalled Tommy's attempt to ask her to be his date. "Well, I'd help you, but I kinda doubt that Da Rules would allow me to poof up a hot tamale for you to go with."

"You're cute in a nerdy sort of way."

"Uh...thanks?"

"You could probably pass as my date."

"What?" Poof asked, hardly believing what she'd just purposed. "I'm-I'm ten years older than you. And, I'm not your species."

Shelby shrugged. "Hey, I'm just throwing out the first idea that pops into my head. And, anyway, it's not like we'd have to kiss or anything. We'd just dance a little, maybe have some snacks, and then go home."

Poof thoughtfully twirled his wand in his hand, something he often did when pondering. "I guess I could do that. Unless you'd rather go with Tommy Turner?"

"Why? It's not like either of us in interested in one another-" Poof burst into a new fit of laughter and fell off the bed from it. "What's so funny?"

Poof appeared above her and asked through his laughter, "What-what's Tammy's phone number? I wanna tell her!"

"Tell her what?" Poof only laughed harder.

* * *

><p>A few nights later, Shelby's mother wouldn't stop taking pictures of her daughter. It was the night of the Romance Dance, and Shelby was starting to regret her idea to go with Poof. Mostly because her mother was more excited than she was. Mom wouldn't stop photographing her and gushing about how nice she looked. And, Shelby did look nice. She wore an orange dress that reached her ankles, and her dark hair was out of its usual cornrows and was now flowing down her back in waves.<p>

The doorbell rang, and Mom strolled merrily to it, singing, "Your fella's here!"

Shelby facepalmed. "Mom, for the tenth time, it's _not_ an actual date! Poof is a friend. _Just_ a human-friend."

"Romance Dance, sweetie. A male 'just friend' does not take a girl to a dance with romance in the title." Mom opened the door as Shelby rolled her eyes.

Poof had cleaned up rather nicely. He wore a light purple button-up shirt and black dress pants, and, despite his futile efforts to slick it back, his lavender was still neatly combed. "Hi, Ms. Maxwell," Poof greeted Shelby's mother. "I'm Poof," without thinking, he raised his wand, "and I'm...your fair..." He realized his mistake and stuffed his wand in his shirt. "Fair...daughter's date for the dance?"

Mom blinked, but decided to ignore the odd greeting. It was no weirder than when her prom date came to pick her up. "Well, it's nice to meet you. By the way, why do they call you Poof?"

Poof fumbled, realizing that he should have prepared for that question. Or, at least, given himself a fake human name. "Um... I'm an aspiring magician?"

"Y-yeah!" Shelby piped up. "Why do you think he had a wand?"

Yep. Still no weirder than prom night. "Well, you kids have fun on your date."

Shelby narrowed her eyes in annoyance. "Not a date!" She followed Poof out the door, and once her mother closed it, she sighed. "Maybe this wasn't a good idea."

Poof put his arm around her. "Ah, come on, Shelby. A little social interaction will do you good. Especially since you're still kinda new to Dimmsdale. Trust me." He raised his wand. "This'll be the best not-date you'll ever have."

A pink cloud that read 'Not-Date Poof' appeared briefly. When it vanished, a horse-drawn pumpkin carriage appeared in its place. Shelby, though intrigued, was a little puzzled. "I thought you said you _wouldn't_ get me a pumpkin carriage."

Poof smirked. "I said I wouldn't get you _glass slippers and_ a pumpkin carriage. I only got you one of those things!" He grabbed her hand and half-led half-dragged her to the carriage. "Come on! This'll be fun!"

Little did they know, Mr. Crocker was in the bushes, spying on them. "I knew it! I knew that girl was a fairy! Only a fairy could look good in a dress that bright and tacky! Now, all I have to do is follow her and that purple-haired human with the fairy-like name to the dance, and I can prove, once and for all, the existance of...FAIRY GODPARENTS! And, maybe I can learn to stop talking out loud to myself."

* * *

><p>At the dance...<p>

Chip Skylark's _My Shiny Teeth and Me_ played as the students - and three fairies in disguise - danced with their partners. Two of those fairies were Cosmo and Wanda, who had magicked themselves into human children, Cosmo in a black tuxedo with a green bowtie, and Wanda in a yellow dress. Cosmo dipped Wanda as giggled with delight. Poof had dipped Shelby nearby.

Poof glanced at his father and asked, "Don't you just love dancing with a beautiful woman, Pop?" which made Shelby blush at the obvious compliment on her part.

Cosmo gave his wife a meaningful look. "I sure do." Wanda blushed. Cosmo looked back at his son and continued, "but I like dancing with your mom, too."

"Oh, knock it off, you idiot!" Wanda snapped, sounding harsher than she intended.

Cosmo wasn't too stupid to know when his wife was angry. "Knock what off? Did I do something stupid again?"

To his surprise, Wanda pushed him away from her and stood up straight, dusting herself off. She spoke through gritted teeth. "That's one way to put it." She almost poofed back home, then she remembered that she was surrounded by humans. She stormed off to the door, fully prepared to head home once the coast was clear. "No one follow me!"

"Snookie...?" Cosmo squeaked, wishing he was smarter, so he could figure out what his wife was so upset about.

Poof and Shelby had stopped dancing. Shelby looked sadly at a teary-eyed Cosmo and said, "You know, Cosmo, when a girl tells you not to follow her, it really means she wants you to follow her."

Cosmo sniffed. "But, that doesn't make se-"

"Hey, Shelby," Tommy greeted happily, completely oblivious to the sour mood. "I was wondering if you, uh, wanted to dance with me?"

Shelby waved him off. "Not now, Tommy. We have a situation."

Tommy frowned. He was about to ask what was wrong, but Tammy ran up to him - as well as she could in a dress - and asked, "So, did she say yes?"

Before Tommy could answer, the music stopped and a spotlight appeared on the stage, revealing Crocker in a black tuxedo. "Attention, students," he called. "I have an anouncement to make: one that I think you'll find rather interesting. You see, it has come to my attention that one of you is a...FAIRY GODPARENT!" Everyone but the godkids and their godparents started laughing. Luckily, Crocker only noticed the laughing children. "Mock me all you want." He hopped off the stage and walked up to Shelby, picked her up, and held her _Lion King_ style. "Behold! A fairy!"

Everyone just stared in confusion for a moment, then Tammy called out, "Yo, Humpback Whale, that's a normal kid."

Crocker grinned mockingly. "Oh, is she?"

Shelby tried - and failed - to squirm free of his grasp. "Let me go, you weirdo!"

Crocker ignored her protests. "If she's not a fairy, then explain how she can float!" He let go of her, but she did not float. Instead, she fell on her bum with a thud. Crocker looked at her in confusion. "Why didn't you float?"

"Crocker!" An angry voice snapped. Principal Waxelplax stormed over and grabbed him by the ear. "How many times do I have to tell you to stop accusing the students of magic?"

"But-" Crocker tried to protest. Waxelplax yanked him out of the gym. "Please! She's a fairy! FAIRIES!"

Once they were gone, there was an awkward silence. No one was quite sure how to react. Then someone started the music back up, and people gradually started dancing again. Poof took Shelby's hand and helped her to her feet. "You okay, kid?"

Shelby dusted herself off. "A little embarrassed, but I'll live."

"Good enough." Poof shot a meaningful look at Tommy, and Tammy pushed her brother towards his crush. "Speaking of good enough..."

Tommy cleared his throat, and Shelby turned around. Tommy held out his hand. "Wanna dance?"

Shelby took his hand. "Why not?"

They went off and danced together, as friends to Shelby. Meanwhile, Tammy went back to her date, and Poof decided to raid the snack table. As for Cosmo, he went off to find Wanda.

But, that's a story for another time.

**The End**

* * *

><p><strong>The next episode will probably involve a confrontation between Cosmo and Wanda. The first person to figure out why Wanda's upset gets a virtual cookie!<strong>

**Also, I've just gotten an account on Deviantart, and I've posted the title cards for the first two episodes on there. I'm not the best artist, but I think they turned out alright. :)**

**This goes without saying: review, people!**


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